Breathing Dreams Like Air – F. Scott Fitzgerald
A dreamer. If I had to describe myself in one word, that would probably be it. I have spent more time dreaming than I should probably ever admit, especially when I was younger. I would jump into bed at night and let the moonlight swallow me whole while my mind wandered. That is how I first met my Prince Charming (although in my version, I saved him from the dragon – so much more interesting). It was how I became an astronaut, a famous author, and a doctor. It was how I lived a million lives before I had even really begun one.
Books and dreams were such a huge part of my life, but I began to question whether others dreamed with the enormity in which I did. I was worried my time spent dreaming about my life would actually prevent me from living it.
It was in the midst of my teenage angst-y years, when I was reading Harry Potter (again) and read:
“It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live.”
Nothing rang truer to me in that moment. I needed to stop fantasizing about life and actually have one. I made it a personal goal to experience more and dream less.
And I did.
I have such a great life. Surely, this isn’t one that I would have if I had stayed wrapped in blankets, staring at the moon. I cherish every memory I have made, including the ones that were a little hazy the next day. I have no regrets.
But I do miss the possibility of dreams.
I am far too old to believe in dragons and magic (okay, I’ll admit – personally, I think no one is too old to believe in magic) and my dreams have been invaded with reality. My bank account isn’t going to support an infinite vacation, my husband isn’t going to wake up one morning with a Jude Law-esque accent, and I probably won’t become a contestant on Master Chef. But are any of those truly impossible?
For my husband and I, 2015 is going to be a big year. We already have 4 trips, 2 shows, and 3 concerts planned. I no longer fear missing out on life. So while I set out on my new adventures and live the life I have dreamed of for so long, I intend to create new dreams.
I am so excited for what is to come!